There’s a popular saying, “move in silence.” It’s advice that shows up everywhere protect your goals by keeping quiet.
But here’s the truth: in my early 20s, silence didn’t just keep me safe it kept me stuck. I would show up, keep my head down, and move quietly through life. On the surface, it looked like focus. In reality, it cost me something big: connection.
If moving in silence is about protecting your growth, moving in alliance is about multiplying it. Here’s how the right people pushed me further than I thought I could go.
The Cost of Moving in Silence
Silence made me feel safe, but it also kept me invisible.
At one point in my 20s, I had no social life. Work, home, repeat. Silence created stability, but it also isolated me.
When I finally decided to make an effort, things began to change. I connected with a former alumni on Bumble BFF who introduced me to her circle. I reconnected with a childhood friend. I built relationships in professional settings and two of my latest friendships that I formed at work is a little over four years old.
Each step reminded me that relationships don’t just happen they grow when you plant yourself in the right environments.
Volunteering That Changed Me
When I joined my alumni association board, I didn’t know what to expect. Suddenly, I found myself surrounded by people with impressive, varied careers. Honestly, it was intimidating. I simply showed up and asked if they needed help.
After my first year, I was asked to serve as treasurer. My instinct was to say no. Public speaking was never my strength. I had even tried Toastmasters and struggled to talk about myself for two minutes.
But they encouraged me and paired me with the former treasurer, who collaborated with me on what to say. That alliance carried me through. For two years, I grew in confidence and even came to see it as one of my proudest accomplishments.
Returning to School
I never imagined going back to school after undergrad. I had struggled then, and I didn’t see it for myself. But people in my network kept steering me toward it, sharing encouragement and saying, “You can do it.” They were also transparent about the opportunities they gained and the salary increases they received from certifications.
That combination of encouragement paired with honesty about outcomes drove me the fastest. Their belief and their stories gave me the push I couldn’t find alone. Alliance made me brave enough to walk back into a classroom after nearly a decade.
The Power of Moving in Alliance
Moving in alliance means putting yourself in spaces where you can be supported, encouraged, and even challenged to grow.
It’s not about forcing connections; it’s about being open enough that the environment does the heavy lifting for you. One of my mentors once told me: “Don’t reinvent the wheel. The information is already out there.” That advice stuck with me. Alliance means the people and the environment provide the blueprint, and all you have to do is step in.
Research supports this. A 2017 study titled The Co-evolution of Emotional Well-Being with Weak and Strong Friendship Ties found that individuals with higher emotional well-being tend to have more strong-tied friends, underscoring the two-way relationship between connection and fulfillment. For more details, you can read here.
Moving in Silence vs. Moving in Alliance
I still believe in moving in silence but only once you’re already moving in the direction you’re headed. Silence protects progress. It’s smart when you’re not in the right environment, when the people around you don’t encourage or uplift you, or when sharing too soon could invite doubt instead of support.
But alliance? Alliance sparks progress. You know you’re in the right environment when people push you forward, ask about your goals, and make space for your growth. In those moments, opening up isn’t risky it’s the very thing that propels you further.
This is one corner of my Self-Care Portfolio:
- Community & Connection: choosing rooms where encouragement fuels growth.
- Skill Development: letting mentors and peers push me beyond what I thought I could do.
- Well-Being: recognizing that being supported is its own form of self-care.
🌱 Self-Care Takeaways
- Growth doesn’t happen in isolation. The right rooms, the right people, can open doors you didn’t even know existed. (Community & Connection)
- Alliance is its own form of self-care by letting yourself be supported instead of carrying everything alone. (Well-Being)
- Sometimes the biggest self-care move is allowing others to push you into places you’d never go by yourself. (Skill Development + Community)
- Silence has its season. Use it to protect momentum, but don’t confuse it with the connection that helps you get started. (Well-Being)
FAQ
What is the meaning of move in silence?
It usually means keeping your goals private until they’re achieved. The idea is to protect your progress from outside pressure or doubt.
What is the saying about moving in silence?
The phrase “move in silence” is often used as advice for success encouraging people to work quietly without seeking attention.
What is the power to move in silence?
Silence can protect your focus, especially in environments that aren’t supportive. But the real power comes when silence meets alliance: staying quiet in the wrong rooms, and opening up in the right ones where people encourage you and help you grow beyond your expectations.
📝 Journal Prompt
Who has been part of your “alliance” someone whose belief or support pushed you further than you could go alone?
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